In our Spring 2020 issue, the amazing holistic coach Judith McAdam wrote about the value of confidence, and we loved hearing her words of wisdom on the subject!
Unlock Your Confidence
Let yourself shine
by Judith McAdam
Many years ago, I had a lovely client who was a very successful model. She lived in America and travelled a lot, strutting her stuff on the most prestigious catwalks around the world. I remember my thoughts as I tucked her up with blankets on the plinth in my healing room. She was in jeans and a jumper, with no make-up on her beautiful face, and her long dark hair was in a plait. Although her outer appearance was attractive, there was something else about her, something deeper. She was allowing herself to shine and be seen in the world. I asked myself the question ‘what makes her different from a lot of the other beautiful women who lie on my plinth?’ There was only one answer – CONFIDENCE.
Then recently I looked at my own 17-year-old daughter. She stood tall, strong and confident before me. I remembered when I was her age, feeling very insecure, with very low self-esteem and hugely lacking in confidence. I remarked to myself ‘where did she come from?’ Then I heard that soft voice within me saying, ‘you. She is copying you now, not when you were 17. She is copying you now, who you are now.’ Right there and then, I realised the power of allowing myself to stand in the fullness of who I am. I was so appreciative that I had had the courage to walk through my fears, not just for me but for my children, and generations of my line.
Spring is a time of growth and new beginnings, so together, right now, let’s plant the seed of CONFIDENCE – not just for yourself, but for all those around you too.
Step 1
At the early stages of creating something different within yourself, it is only a flicker of a thought. The momentum around it isn’t strong. It seems like the idea of CONFIDENCE is just there and fairly unobtainable. You have to be careful here, because at this stage you will begin to sabotage yourself. Instead of looking at your lack of confidence, look at moving forward step by step. You may not know how you are going to do this yet, but you will. You wouldn’t plant a seed in the ground and expect it to bloom straight away, would you?
Step 2
Your seed of CONFIDENCE is vulnerable and has not yet formed enough inside you that you can see it yet. Try not to speak about what you are doing to too many people, just in case they put you off with their fears. Observe yourself. See how and where your lack of confidence holds you back. Then just push yourself a tiny bit and step through these fears. Mantras and affirmations create momentum. One of my favourite mantras is ‘I can do this’. As momentum starts to gather, I change this mantra to ‘I am doing this’. Don’t just say the mantra in unawareness. Say it with conviction – ‘I can do this’ – create a feeling around it. YOU REALLY CAN DO IT!
Step 3
Use as many tools as you can because the pull of self-doubt, lack of confidence, lack of self-belief and fear will be great. Read self-help books, listen to podcasts, meditations and visualisations. These tools will encourage you to keep stepping. To help you, I have created seven principles in my book The Source: Connect with Your Inner Power and Create Your Own Reality. It is now available on Audio, Google Play and iTunes. There are also some powerful free visualisations on my website to support you as you consciously create CONFIDENCE in your own life.
With love,
Judith
