Low self esteem effects people from all walks of life and is one of the biggest reasons why people feel unhappy and unfulfilled in their lives. People come to life coaching because they want things to be different in their lives, they want to know how to be happy, how to be successful, how to achieve their goals. But one of the biggest issues holding people back from making changes and getting the life that they really want, is low self esteem.
If you find that you talk yourself out of doing things for fear of ‘making a mistake’ or being deemed a ‘failure’, then your self esteem may need a boost. Practicing these 10 simple habits on a daily basis will soon have you out of the low self esteem trap.
1. Get involved. Learning a new skill or becoming part of something bigger than yourself (like a community project) can really work wonders for your self esteem.
2. Get interested. By becoming interested in other people, you give yourself mental space away from your own pre-occupations and worries. When you engage with people in this way, you feel valued and needed.
3. Treat yourself better. Making a mistake, failing or behaving badly does not mean that you are a failure or a bad person; so stop being so hard on yourself. Acknowledge and praise your achievements, even the smallest ones. Start treating yourself like you would a good friend or a small child.
4. Take Responsibility. The way you think and talk impacts on your feelings and emotional state, so ‘choose’ to think and speak more positively. Ask yourself if there is something that you can do to make things better and stop blaming and complaining. This type of behavior makes you feel more in control and can be a major boost for self esteem.
5. Go with the flow. Going with the flow means accepting things just the way they are. When you let go of the need to control things, you become less fearful, stressed and anxious.
6. Pursue personal goals. Investing in your future gives a great sense of purpose. Small milestones or achievements along the way can often boost confidence more than achieving the overall goal.
7. Stop worrying about what other people think. If you place too much emphasis on being liked and accepted by others, your self esteem will fluctuate based on the response you get from others. Being true to yourself is far more empowering.
8. Be yourself. When you don’t express your opinion, tastes and interests, people are deprived form getting to know the real you. So be who you are, because you never know who would love the person you hide.
9. Be Grateful. Every night, try to list 5 things that happened during the day that you are grateful for. You may start to notice that your life isn’t so bad after all and in fact you have quite a lot to be thankful for.
10. Body talk. How we carry ourselves, can have a profound affect on your mental state and mood. So when your self esteem is on the floor, force yourself to sit up straight, walk tall and smile. You will be amazed at the affect it has on your mood and self esteem.
Patricia Keane is a life coach and owner of Live Simply in Dublin 2.