Love & Relationships
In the Winter 2018/19 edition of Spirituality in the City, we asked some of our readers to answer the profound question, ‘what does love mean to me?’ Their answers were deeply enlightening and heartwarming. They gave us a lot to ponder about!
In this sneak peek from our Winter 2018/19 issue, our resident Tantra expert Dawn Cartwright explored the inherent beauty of winter months, and how it can bring us closer to ourselves and to our beloved ones. Her suggested ceremony that you can perform at this time of year – Winter Lovers – is aimed at kindling Tantric energies and supporting lovers as they merge with themselves and one another.
Judith McAdam is our newest regular writer and we are thrilled to have her on board. If you haven’t seen it already, make sure you check out the visualisation track we created with her – it is available to purchase on our site right now. Below, we are sharing a sneak peek of her fantastic article on negative and positive momentum, which appears in our Winter 2018/19 issue. Check here for your nearest stockist, or subscribe to receive a copy direct to your door.
In the face of death, how can we stay anchored in love? This final article for Positive Life from the amazing Dee Wallace touches on a theme that holds great resonance for many people during November (the month of remembrance and honouring the souls of those who have passed). This article appeared in our Autumn 2018 issue.
Love and Death
Staying Anchored in Love
by Dee Wallace
Those are the two topics which seem to be permeating the energy right now. Let’s talk about love first.
My beloved older brother, Dennis, was visiting the last two weeks. Through all the trials and instability of our childhoods, Denny was my rock. Throughout his life, he was voted one of the country’s top young men to succeed, became a minister, worked for President Nixon, created several businesses and raised three amazing children. He also took dreadful care of himself: resulting in strokes, heart attacks and brain damage. He lost his business. He lost his house. At 75, he looks older than he should, and is depressed about his losses.
His visit reminded me of what my mother – saint of love – taught me about my aunt, a recovering, cranky alcoholic, when she was riddled with cancer. As a young adult I was often disgusted at her incapacity to conduct herself with dignity.
My mother took me aside quietly, looked deep into my eyes, and said:
You didn’t know your Auntie Lee when she was the first to graduate college in the family, or the first to be a successful businesswoman, or the myriad of times she paid our rent, or supported me when daddy was so sick, or helped take care of you kids financially. She is important to me, D.D., She is my sister, and I love her. We don’t stop loving people because they lose their way, or get old, or get sick, or can’t live with as much dignity. We love people because that is the right thing to do. No matter what. And we remember them for who they truly are, and the vibrant people they have been.
When I got to spend this valuable time with my brother, we spent many hours reminiscing about his victories of life. I spent a lot of time celebrating who he is, who he was, and most importantly, encouraging him to be who he still can be. That’s life. That’s being vibrant till the last moment. So many people are waiting to die because they have changed from “the person they used to be”, instead of asking, “How can I live to my fullest NOW?”
I have experienced so much death in my life. It is never easy. No one expects it to be. But the channel wants to give us all some insight and comfort about this.
1) No one leaves without choice. You’ll never understand it, but you can have peace in accepting it
2) Your loved one’s energy is always available to you. Talk to them. And LISTEN and feel their response. As in everything, you must ask for them to touch you with their presence.
3) Trust yourself to connect. It is easy.
4) You may be given pictures, or memories, or emotions. Know that those are all forms of communication.
5) Move into a place of joy and acceptance and love as quickly as you can. It helps free their energy to connect with you.
6) Remember, you are the power and the love that chooses to create this connection. Embrace it and celebrate it when you are ready.
Death is a birthday for those who leave. It is a challenge for those “left behind” to move on, live in love, and experience the rest of life with joyful creation. Yes, it can be hard … until there is a choice made to embrace it. Honour your loved ones by living life to the fullest. They want it that way.
“Love’s stronger than fear and death.”
– Steve Hackett
“Love has no age, no limit; and no death.”
– John Galsworthy
In a world where it can sometimes be difficult to stand in our power and be assertive, Dawn Cartwright offers her advice on how we can clearly communicate ‘our true ‘yes’ and our honest ‘no”. This article appears in our Autumn 2018 issue – to pick up a copy, just check your nearest stockist or subscribe to the magazine today.
The Art of Assertiveness
When to say yes and how to say no
by Dawn Cartwright
According to researchers at Cornell University, we make 35,000 conscious decisions each day. That’s thirty-five thousand opportunities every single day to move closer to, or farther away from, our dreams. Our decisions create our future. The clearer we are about when to say ‘yes’ and how to say ‘no’, the more likely we are to be true to ourselves and create a life that reflects who we are.
In a world where there’s pressure to conform and fit in, decisions are often made based on expectations, rather than the truth we feel inside. We lose ourselves. We slide into accommodating others because it seems easier. We avoid the less familiar emotions, and the closeness and bonding that comes from facing and working through them, to maintain an illusion of peace. We feel our true ‘yes’ and our honest ‘no’ and we second guess them, or push them aside. Yet we long to be intimate. We long to be accepted. We long to be loved as we truly are.
How do we get in touch with our innermost feelings and thoughts? What does it mean to be someone who says ‘yes’ and ‘no’ honestly? How do we express ourselves truthfully, with kindness? How do we create a life filled with possibility, intimacy and freedom? How do we become who we are capable of being?
In 1943 Abraham Maslow introduced Positive Psychology, the scientific study of the positive and elevating aspects of human behaviour. Maslow believed that every human being has a strong desire to realise their full potential, to be who they are capable of being. He created a model called Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs, providing a map to becoming who we truly are. This map is useful in our quest to know when to say yes and how to say no.
When To Say Yes
- The Basics: Do you have shelter? Clothing? Food? Clean water? Are you meeting your sexual needs? If not, the stress of these unmet needs will interfere with your inner compass. Meet these needs and you’ll create a strong foundation. You’ll begin to recognise when you’re saying ‘yes’ because you’re depleted, cold, tired, hungry, thirsty or sexually unfulfilled, and when you’re saying yes because yes is what you truly feel.
- Safety: Our vigilant brain is the part of the brain that registers a threat and prompts us to say ‘yes’ to keep us from harm. Human beings have a natural desire for a predictable, orderly world. Having a daily routine like a morning walk or an evening meditation is a great way to create stability. Meet these needs and your ‘yes’ will be grounded in safety.
- Belonging: Humans are tribal beings. The need for togetherness is probably one of the most important and least met needs in the world today. Create healthy friendships. Engage in group activities that are meaningful to you. Meet this need and your yes will no longer come from a fear of being abandoned. Instead, yes will boost your feeling of belonging.
- Self-Esteem: A healthy sense of self is essential to being and becoming who we’re meant to be. When our self-esteem is low, we say ‘yes’ to gain approval. When self-esteem is high, we align with our core values no matter what. Know your core values, make a list.
- The Peak: Be truly you. That’s when your yes to others matches the yes you feel inside.
How To Say No
- The Basics: Fill your own cup. If you’ve had enough sleep, food, water and sex, chances are you’ll be more in touch with your natural generosity. You’ll be alert, relaxed, open and present, this in itself is a gift. Turn toward the person you’re saying no to, put both feet on the ground, relax your body, feel your generosity and say ‘no’.
- Safety: Pace yourself. Create a pace in all your relationships that makes it possible for you to maintain connection with yourself and with the other. Create emotional stability and safety for yourself and this will translate as emotional stability and safety for the other when you say ‘no’.
- Belonging: Be tribal. When we’re afraid to say no, we disappear and abandon the other person emotionally. Stay connected to your own heart. Stay emotionally connected to the other. Build a bridge of togetherness when you say ‘no’.
- Self-Esteem: Share your values. Believe in yourself. Believe in the other person. You are resilient! They are resilient! Self-acceptance makes you trustable and compassionate. Open your heart, be respectful, say ‘no’.
- The Peak: You are incredibly you. When you have fulfilled all your needs and you are consistently being and becoming who you are meant to be, your no is as positive as your yes.
Dawn Cartwright is a Tantric visionary, sacred writer, world traveler, and innovator in bio-energetic Tantra fusion. You’re invited to join her in 2019 for The Red Tent: Women’s Sacred Sexuality, April 12th – 14th, Be Fully Alive: Level 1 Tantra Immersion, April 26th – 28th, in the Wicklow Mountains and Weaving the Beloveds: Couples Tantra Retreat, May 3rd – 6th, in Lower Rosses, Sligo.
In our Autumn 2018 issue, eight of our readers shared with us what their relationships have meant to them. This season, it’s all about the bonds of love! You can pick up a copy of the magazine at our stockists across the country, or subscribe here to receive a copy direct to your door.
SPIRITUALITY & THE CITY
THE BONDS OF LOVE
Liz Lynch & Ciara O’Neill (couple)
It is hard to put into words how I feel about this wonderful woman. She is full of life, love and laughter. Ciara and I share a quirky sense of humour and I know that with her, I can always be fully myself, no matter how silly that is.
Ciara has great empathy for other people’s worries. I am lucky that she has made it her mission in life to take care of me. Ever since I started dating Ciara, I have felt enveloped by her boundless love and I hope she feels the same from me.
Ciara is very modest and doesn’t seem to know how wonderful she is. Her smile lights up a room and her laughter is infectious. I feel blessed every day knowing she is my wife.
My wedding day was the happiest day of my life. I am so grateful to everybody who campaigned for marriage equality, and of course the wonderful Irish people who voted yes to love on that magical day in May 2015.
What I love most about Liz is her caring and compassionate nature. There is nothing she wouldn’t do for the people she loves.
Liz is the funniest person I have ever met and she makes me laugh every day. Meeting Liz is the best thing that has ever happened to me. She is my best friend and favourite person in the whole world. I know that she believes in me and loves me unconditionally, and that is the best feeling in the world.
Martin & Magda Janik (couple)
Magda is my soulmate. I know it isn’t our first life together: we have loved each other many times before. Her calmness, her beauty, her love and the amazingly multi-dimensional depth of her being makes each life so worth living. I had a dream about Magda after I saw her for the first or second time, and after that dream, I knew she was the one. We were 16 and 17 at that time. This year was our 25th anniversary of being a couple and our 20th wedding anniversary. Magda stands by me during our happiest and most challenging moments and I love her to bits. She is an amazing mum to our daughter Pola, who we both absolutely adore.
I love Martin: my husband and my best friend. Martin is warm, loving, kind and funny. He has a great passion for life and energy that always amazes me. He is intelligent, creative, and always eager to learn and experience new things, which makes our journey together very interesting. We always know what each other is thinking without saying a single word. Martin makes me feel loved every day and I love him for that. He is also a fantastic father to our daughter Pola, who adores him.
This year is very special for us as we are celebrating 25 years together and the 20th anniversary of our wedding. I am grateful for each of those years and excited about all the years to come.
Dave Weakley & Sara Weis (father and daughter)
My dad is a great person: very kind, hilariously funny and super talented as well. He is a wonderful human being. Because we both work in the field of music, we have a lot in common. I’ve learned a huge amount from him. His advice is very valuable to me. Music is such a difficult profession, it’s great to have people around you who understand that and who can be supportive. Both of my parents are hugely supportive – they both work in the arts – and they are wonderful. My dad is my inspiration. We have great craic together, and he’s just the best dad I could ever have asked for. His experience of getting out there and putting himself before an audience taught me how to be brave.
Sara is so talented. From a very early age, she always showed promise and excellence at singing and acting, and this promise has really borne fruit over the last few months. She recently began to put herself out there and start singing … and she is absolutely marvellous. I could go on forever about my tremendous admiration for her!
I’m incredibly proud of her. I know parents are supposed to be the role model for their children, but she is more of a role model for me. I’m a musician myself, and I derive a lot of joy from listening to her and watching her while she is performing.
Livia Devi & Carolyne Marks (friends)
Carolyne and I share a sacred space of beautiful heart-connection, love, joy, respect and appreciation. Her wisdom and life experience always guide me on my path. Her teachings about love, life and relationships have helped me to grow and evolve. We always have so much fun and laugher when we meet, enjoying life to the full!Her presence in my life is a like a warm ocean breeze on a summer day. The stillness, flow and richness of our connection its so cherished!
I am truly honored and grateful to have you as a friend, Carolyne.
My name is Carolyne and I am very fortunate! Why? I have a beautiful friend and her name is Livia. Yes, she is physically beautiful, no doubt about that: however, what I am referring to with the word ‘beautiful’ goes far beyond that superficial perspective. You see, as within, so without. My friend is beautiful in Soul. When we are together, there is simply harmony, peace and so much joy. At times, we have very deep, fulfilling and meaningful conversations and I love to grow with her this way, as well as simply sitting in silence and connecting on a very different level at other times. When out and about, we like similar things, laugh about the same nonsense and appreciate the world and nature with all our hearts. Being able to share this love of life with someone is a great treasure and a special gift.
This version of our long-running, ever-popular Spirituality and the City series appeared in the summer 2018 issue. In this instalment, it was all about LOVE. Love appears in many forms in human relationships, and here, we celebrated that wonderful fact. Thank you to everyone who contributed!
Couple: Eva Lennox and Andrew McAvinchy
Eva: The thing I love the most about Andrew is his big heart. He is a beautiful, kind and sensitive man with a wicked sense of adventure. He is full of sweetness and a joy for life and I feel grateful that I get to experience all of the undulations of life with him. He is capable of holding a deep level of intimacy that continues to bring our relationship beyond previous boundaries.
We are different in lots of ways and sometimes that drives me mad, but it offers the possibility to see things from different perspectives. I love that Andrew is my husband, I love that he is my friend, I love that he is in my life. I just love Andrew!
Andrew: Ram Dass said in a Netflix documentary we watched together recently that Rama asked Hanuman, “Who are you?” Hanuman answered, “When I don’t know who I am, I serve you. When I know who I am, I am you.”
Eva and I are always in this dance where sometimes I feel like Forrest Gump waltzing awkwardly with Jenny for the first time, other times we rock and roll like John Travolta and Uma Thurman in Pulp Fiction. What I love about her is that she’s always listening to the music, no matter what is playing, and she’ll always give me a gentle nudge so I can find my rhythm again. Eva is kind, open, fiercely loyal and sexy as hell. What’s not to love?
Mum, Saralee Cassidy, and Sons
As a family we have our ups and downs, however, we are very open and truthful about how and what we feel, our experiences, fears and loves. When we’re having a heightened day things can go a little awry, so on those particular days we like to practice a simple feel good exercise; we affirm what we love about each other! There is only one rule – keep ?it very real! Here’s a little peek into our world!
Rory, who is the youngest, is loved for his kindness to animals, for being smart, nice and so funny. Peter, who is the middle man, is loved for being smart, a leader and cool and good to play games. Jack, who is the eldest, is loved for being super smart, creative and great at the Xbox. Mummy is loved for being different, smart, being in her own world, being kind and hugs.
It’s a very simple exercise but it does create an attitude of gratitude for every person in the family.
Couple: Antoinette and Ben Patton
Ben: There are loads of things I love about Antoinette, but lately what comes to mind is the way conversation flows with her. We both do a lot of thinking out loud, and often my opinions aren’t fully formed and can be controversial, but regardless she is willing to give them a chance. I think we both recognise that conversation with your spouse needn’t be as careful as with everyone else; we can create a sloppy dialogue together. There’s a trust there that I really value, and it has only grown since getting married. I think in the age of digital footprints this type of liberated, unjudged dialogue is a rare and special thing.
Antoinette: I love his curiosity and enthusiasm. I love how open and genuine he is. His positivity is contagious: it’s hard to be around him and not feel happy. He’s also a lot more sensible and practical than I am: he keeps me grounded.
We’ve travelled together, worked together and occupied some pretty tiny apartments together. He’s my constant companion and I feel halved when he’s not by my side.
Mother, Lynn, and daughter, Sienna Hodgins
Lynn: Sienna is the brightest part of my life. From the very second she came into this world, she has made me the happiness and proudest Mum. She’s quick witted, intuitive, thoughtful, fun and such a gentle, loving soul. Guiding her through this life is the best gift and purpose l could have ever wished for. She has been a great teacher to me in many ways. I can’t picture what my life would have looked like without her in it. I’m very grateful. She is my world and l value every second l’m with her.
Sienna: I love my mum so much because she’s different to other mums. She has helped me though everything in my life. If ever l have a problem, she sorts it out. She’s not just my mum, she’s my best friend. It’s just been me and mum for most of my life and I’ve loved every second of it. She’s so much fun, I love her smile and she’s a great chef. My mum is very adventurous and my life has always been very exciting. She works hard to give me a great life. She’s the best Mum in the world and l wouldn’t want any other Mum.
In this beautiful article from our Summer 2018 issue, Amanda Collins invites us to open up to the power of allowing ourselves to be vulnerable. You can pick up a copy of the magazine at your local stockist or subscribe here.
Opening to the Gifts of Vulnerability
At peace with being YOU
By Amanda Collins
I was in my late twenties before I really understood what vulnerability meant and the gifts it offered. It was much easier for me to act positively and say that everything was just fine, rather than share that soft and sacred part of myself with anyone.
Over time I saw the benefits of acknowledging my own vulnerability. My introduction to vulnerability came at a time when I had no choice. My dearest girlfriend became ill and died of cancer, and I experienced a domino effect of grief and sadness. I had no choice but to allow myself to be VULNERABLE. Thank goodness I had people who could hold me and show me that I was safe, even if I felt sad, weak and powerless, and therefore vulnerable.
Another time when I had no choice but to acknowledge my vulnerability was after the birth of each of my children. At such a time no woman is able to do it all herself. By acknowledging this fact and accepting the love and support of others I was able to look at this special time as a gift and an opportunity to go deeper into myself.
I understand why being vulnerable and showing it can be scary. It feels that you are opening yourself up to rejection and it’s natural to react by wanting to protect yourself; but really, a defensive reaction brings more hurt mentally, physically, and emotionally. You remain bound, constrained, and unable to heal and to better know yourself.
I still remember those days when I was just beginning to allow myself to be vulnerable. I was sure that I my friends and others would reject me. I imagined that they would not accept me if I revealed any weakness or need. But the more I did precisely that, the more I discovered that people’s reaction was the complete opposite. We became closer and our relationships became more real.
Do you also feel that being vulnerable will make you seem weak or broken? Let me assure you once again that the opposite will actually happen. You will become more confident, for you are no longer feeling like you are hiding parts of yourself and being a fraud. Imagine the relief and release that will bring as the real you–all of you–emerges!
Benefits of Allowing Yourself to Be Vulnerable:
- Becoming at peace with who you are
- Feeling more grounded
- Experiencing more freedom and less pretense
- Sensing the world as a safer place
- Expanding your heart with self-compassion and forgiveness
- Allowing others to offer emotional support
- Strengthening your nervous and immune systems
- Developing trust, confidence, and a greater sense of self-worth.
- Replacing isolation and loneliness with connection
- Taking back your power to be yourself
- Learning to ask for what you need
Practical Tips For Accepting Your Vulnerability
- Know the light and dark in your self
- Accept that you are worthy to be heard, known and loved
- Be willing to risk expressing your thoughts, feelings, and wishes
- Don’t clench when you sense yourself becoming vulnerable; open instead
- Trust that you can deal with the outcome, no matter what
- Stay connected to yourself
- Remember that everyone else is going through something, too
- Practice with people who help you feel safe
How To Know You Are Not Being Vulnerable:
- You do not have close friendships
- You constantly feel like you are hiding
Sharing your vulnerability takes tremendous courage, but it also allows others to share their pain, as well as their joys, and bring you closer. When you stop worrying what others think of you and stop trying to appear perfect, you will be amazed by the gifts that come to you.
This beautiful article appeared in our Spring 2018 issue, and here, we share it in its entirety. Following the tragic death of her son Erik, Elisa Medhus gradually began to open up to the idea of the afterlife … and felt her son draw closer to her as a result. In her books, ‘My Son and the Afterlife’ and ‘My Life After Death’ – co-authored by Erik, with help from a medium – she expressed his message of hope and consolation, as well as offering information on the hidden miracles of the afterlife can bring: a gift that is intended to help and support us during our lives here on Earth.
Insights from the Afterlife: Heavenly wisdom advancing life on earth
By Alison McEvoy
Just twenty years and fifteen days after he was born into this world as Erik Rune Medhus, Erik took his own life and entered the afterlife. His family initially plunged into a deep grief and bewilderment, but when Erik’s soul began to make contact from the beyond, a whole universe of spiritual understanding on the nature of life, death and the afterlife unfolded into their lives.
Erik’s mother Elisa had been raised by two atheists and had become a physician. She was a complete sceptic when it came to notions of life after death and of anything outside the scientific realm. The gift which lay in the aftermath of her son’s death was the unravelling of her scepticism about the spirit world. Erik helped Elisa to make the journey from ‘sceptic to believer’.
After various encounters had occurred between Erik and his family members, Elisa decided to have a channelling session with Spirit Translator Jamie Butler. As time went on, Erik and Elisa realized that the reconnection they were now making, and all that had happened in Erik’s life, was part of a soul contract they had made with each other.
‘One of the most interesting answers to the “why” of all the pain and suffering I experienced in my life as Erik I didn’t figure out until much later…I was supposed to be a guide and help humans, and the compassion, empathy, and listening skills I gained during my life were important for me to become a better one… [It] came down to the spiritual contract my soul had picked for itself.’ (Erik Medhus, My Life After Death)
Soon after Erik’s death, Elisa set up a blog called Channelling Erik®. The blog aspired to provide a community of loving support and an outlet for those experiencing pain and grief. Erik began taking part, visiting blog members and sending messages through Jamie. The nature of their soul contract began to crystallise – together they would blog, make videos and write books, bringing the wisdom of the afterlife to the earthly plane to help people live happier, more loving lives and to have faith in the great return to LOVE which awaits us after death.
Continuation of life after death
The fear Erik sensed in his loved ones, due to the belief that death was the end, was something he wanted to help them with. He wanted to assure them of there being a consciousness that remains after death and to enable them to understand death as a ‘transition’ rather than permanent separation. This work with his family was the beginning of his role as a spirit guide to help release humanity in general from the fear of death.
In his book My Life After Death, Erik shares the entire story, in incredible and often humorous detail, of his death, his funeral, meeting with deceased family members who help guide him to the other side, and coming to terms with his existence as the essence of himself as a spirit – a being of pure energy. He tells of his life review, where he is supported by a team of spirits who help him to uncover the love, understanding and forgiveness in himself which often eluded him during his life on earth.
Impressions of Erik on earth
Among the many interviews and discussions where Erik shares insight from heaven, on some of the most perplexing questions we have as humans, there are some in which Erik’s voice can be heard. In others, various orbs of lights have appeared. These impressions of sound and image which Erik makes are not apparent during the live recordings. Every so often one is discovered in retrospect and brought to Elisa’s attention. Eventually, Elisa became intrigued enough to send these impressions to audio-visual experts for analysis. The result of analysis found that the sounds had left no voiceprint and yet were, nonetheless, audible on the playback. This confirmed that the voice was not a human voice. For those that knew him, they recognise the tone and pronunciation as Erik’s own.
Connections with Ireland
The Channelling Erik® blog community continues to extend, stretching across the Atlantic with members in Ireland linking into the fold of this supportive group. Elisa and her daughter Kristina Braly visited Ireland recently to attend the wedding of a blog member in Dublin. Having flown into Shannon, they rented a car and drove along the ‘scenic route’ to the capital. They video-blogged the entire trip on YouTube, taking in the views from the Cliffs of Moher, the ring of Kerry and even kissing the Blarney stone.
We spoke to Elisa and Erik, through medium Veronica Drake, to hear what Erik had to share with Positive Life readers in Ireland. The following are snapshots from that conversation.
LOVE is the universal language in heaven. The soul expresses LOVE in feelings. Erik tells us that we can bring the vibration of the heavenly realm into our earthly experience by becoming more willing to feel and express LOVE.
To stop, breathe and be in the experience of LOVE during challenging times, creates a much more compassionate existence on earth. On the heavenly plane no effort is needed, as the energy of LOVE is all-pervading. Here on earth, to make this moment to moment choice to act from the experience and energy of LOVE is part of a wider shift involving the whole of humanity. A shift which Erik assures us will occur “gracefully”, gently and yet powerfully in 2018.
On Brain vs Mind:
The Brain is like a computer. It uploads everything that happens to us. It memorises all of the mandates we are given as a child by our parents, teachers and caretakers. It is where all our ‘programming’ is stored – all those statements telling us who we are and how we are meant to be. Think ‘little girls wear pink’, and ‘big boys don’t cry’.
The Mind, on the other hand, is our energetic connection to the soul. The mind has the potential to think for itself once an individual chooses the spiritual path. When a person evolves and enlightens, the mind awakens. The mind then enables us to be conscious of CHOICE. There are choices available to us as to who and how to be, outside of the options given to us by the programming of the brain. Most significantly, an awakened mind allows us to CHOOSE LOVE instead of fear.
According to Erik, one mistake humans often make is thinking first and feeling second. More often than not it goes like this: we think a thought – that thought evokes an emotion – this emotion generates our decision to act in a certain way. So let’s say someone doesn’t reply to your email. You start thinking variations on the theme that this person doesn’t care, they just can’t be bothered. Cue anger, bitterness and frustration. These emotions require an outlet – namely angry, embittered actions. These actions will no doubt cause more of the same to come into being.
Instead, Erik advises us to feel first. We can CHOOSE to tap into our intuition and emotional intelligence first. We can CHOOSE to allow a true emotional connection with ourselves to occur and for these emotions to generate our thoughts and thus guide our actions. Being guided by emotional authenticity with ourselves – while this can be scary and make us feel vulnerable – is the route to a more authentic and compassionate life.
You’ll find Elisa and Erik’s blog sprinkled with offerings like these, serving the curious and the questioning among you, giving support to those whose will to live is wavering, and providing connection for those in need of comfort who have experienced the tragic death of a loved one. Erik continuously reaches out with answers from heaven and messages of insight, hope, wisdom and encouragement.