We introduced a new feature into our magazine for the Autumn 2021 issue: Teen Spirit, written by the talented Margot Tubbiolo. She shared a powerful piece on what it means to fearlessly speak your truth, regardless of what age you are.
Speak Freely
Your truth is an acquired taste
by Margot Tubbiolo
I was recently watching an episode of Love island (typical teen behaviour). Some may ask, ‘what spiritual knowledge can you gain from a show like that?’
To that I would say; you can gain knowledge from anything if you look hard enough. In this scenario, one of the contestants was trying to act ‘unbothered’ that the guy she liked was going out on a date. It made me think, ‘why do we conceal our feelings towards another person?’
I came up with a few possible answers:
• We’re afraid of getting hurt, because it leads us to feel a lack of control over our own emotions.
• We’re trying to please the other person in some way.
• We’re not used to speaking our truth, since we have no time limit as young people.
• All of the above.
I’m going to safely say number four for this one.
I guess what I want to focus on in my article is why young people feel the need to hide their true emotions, and how that’s detrimental not only to themselves, but to potential relationships they are missing out on.
I’ll start with reason 1.
Reason 1: We’re afraid of getting hurt, because it leads us to feel a lack of control over our own emotions.
Control, I think, is something that everyone loves to have. It puts us in a position of power. We all know that power is something humans crave. However, to give in to a lack of control is where real strength lies. This means accepting your fate and accepting that you’ve given someone else the power to hurt you. That’s something that a lot of people run from – including me. However, denying yourself this vulnerability can lead to you passing by a necessary experience for your personal growth.
‘There is a price to pay for speaking the truth. There is a bigger price for living a lie.’
Reason 2: We’re trying to please the other person in some way.
I think this point comes from not wanting to push the other person away. We try to please them by denying ourselves our true emotions. This scenario doesn’t really get either party anywhere. People pleasing is strange, because many people do it, and end up making themselves unhappy. The reality is, we can’t really make someone else happy if we are not happy ourselves. You can’t give what you don’t have.
Reason 3: We’re not used to speaking our truth, since we have no time limit as young people.
Young people are just getting used to dealing with emotions. We feel like we have all the time in the world, so we don’t see it as a bad thing to hide how we feel. Sometimes I think we need a bit of a push telling us it doesn’t matter if we have loads of time. What matters is speaking our truth now.
Reason 4: All of the above.
The main thing I wanted to convey with this piece is that there is so much integrity in saying what you want to say. You have that right at any age, no matter how young you are. The worry of judgement has to be put to one side, so we can be our true selves. Even if we don’t know it, there is a time limit to life. Your truth is not for everyone, but ‘it’s better to be hated for what you are than loved for what you are not.’
