In our Summer 2020 issue, Sandy Newbigging spoke about how we can bring about changes in the world by first being the change within ourselves. We loved hearing his words of wisdom – very apt for this time in humanity’s story. Read on below!
Renowned meditation coach Sandy Newbigging is one of our regular contributors, and we always love to read his words of wisdom! Today, we are sharing a sneak peek of his article in our Spring 2020 issue, where he talked about how life is a series of new beginnings.
Renowned meditation coach and author Sandy Newbigging is a regular contributor to our magazine, and we love reading his words of wisdom! Read on to enjoy his most recent contribution, to our Winter 2019/20 issue.
Before Christmas, we published a sneak peek of Sandy Newbigging’s article – ‘The Love Lesson’ – from our Winter 2018/19 issue, and today we are pleased to share it in full. Sandy has many words of advice to share on how we can learn how to give love without limits.
We love these words of wisdom by the renowned meditation coach and author Sandy Newbigging. In this sneak peek from our Winter 2018/19 issue, he shares his advice on how to generate a greater sense of love in our lives.
In this extract from our Summer 2018 issue, our meditation writer Sandy Newbigging discusses the perils of becoming overly attached to a particular outcome – and how we can break the trap.
The Attach Catch
Break the trap of attachment
By Sandy Newbigging
Attachment happens whenever you believe that being, doing or having x, y or z will make you happier, peaceful, loved, successful or some other desirable state. Being attached makes you move away from wanting certain things to believing that you need them to be OK.
Growing up, you probably learned what a good life looks like: how much money you should earn, the kind of house you should live in, the type of person you should end up with, the shape of body you should have, even the make and model of car you should drive.
Highly motivated to achieve this good life, we take our rulebook of requirements and set about doing everything we possibly can to make it all happen.
Temporary highs at best
I remember getting into a convertible I’d just bought with the advance from one of my earlier book deals. Before leaving the showroom, I sat for a few moments looking around at my new purchase. I felt great! Then I looked to my right and noticed a little scratch on the side panel and thought: Oh well, I’ll be happy when I get that fixed!
Sitting in my expensive convertible, which I’d spent years working to get, my mind gave me about five seconds of pure joy before it found something to judge negatively and resist. Can you relate to this? Without realising it at the time, I had immediately become attached to the scratch being removed before I could fully enjoy the car again. This is just one example of the many times when I inadvertently fell into what I refer to as the ‘Attach Catch’.
Left unseen, the mind can postpone your peace and happiness and be busy forever.
Attachment and the compulsion to overthink
There is a direct relationship between being attached to things being a certain way and the compulsion to overthink. Whenever your mind believes that it needs something to be OK, it becomes very active in trying to figure out how to get away from where you are now and into a more appealing time in the future.
Attachment dulls your experience. It stops the present moment from ever being good enough, leading to discontentment. Attachment leads to a very limited life in which you need to control and manipulate things to fit your rulebook of requirements. As a result, the mind is given good cause to start producing copious amounts of thoughts about how to improve your circumstances.
Quick cure: Let go of things needing to be different
Ever catch yourself thinking this classic attachment thought? I’ll be happy when…
Take a moment to consider all the things that you think you need to change, fix or improve before you can be truly happy: whether it is your job, relationship, finances, the healing of a physical condition or something else.
Then consider this simple statement in the context of your attachment: I can want this without needing it. When I invite my coaching clients and course or retreat participants to do this exercise, I see the same transformations happen time and time again. Common responses are ‘I feel relief’, ‘I feel calm’, ‘I feel free’, along with a range of other really lovely experiences. What happens for you when you are courageously contented?
Fascinating February! The longest month of the year has now passed and we have already began to see the light of day staying longer with us, signalling the coming spring! The month of February and its contagious loving feeling has arrived. Whether you are expecting to receive or planning to give the gift of love to a friend, family member or a soulmate, the atmosphere of kindness and love is all around us. Even during these unusual times, empathy and the desire to give to those less fortunate prevails! In this edition we have some wonderful news for you. On February 10th, Positive Nights welcomes John Bowker for a Valentine’s Heartsongs Special. You can click here to read more about it and book your place. We are also bringing you wonderful events, books and the chance to win some lovely prizes.
LOMI LOMI TRAININGS: ALOHA HOUSE, IRELAND
Aloha House is based in Killorglin, County Kerry, and is the home of Lomi Lomi Ireland School of Hawaiian Healing Arts. They offer workshops and certified training in Lomi Lomi massage and other training’s and classes such as Kua Lua Hawaiian Backwalking & Yoga.
For the upcoming workshops and more info click here
DAWN CARTWRIGHT BACK IN IRELAND
Dawn Cartwright will be back in Ireland to impart her Tantra knowledge in 3 amazing workshops. She will also be our guest at our Positive Nights event on Thursday, April 19th, 2017 (more info coming soon).
Women’s Sacred Sexuality
The Red Tent . Wicklow
Apr 20, 2017 – Apr 21, 2017
Sacred Sexuality . How We Love
2-Nights of Tantric Bliss . Wicklow
Apr 21, 2017 – Apr 23, 2017
Weaving the Beloveds
Boutique Couples Retreat . Sligo
Apr 28, 2017 – May 01, 2017
RISE SISTER RISE WITH REBECCA CAMPBELL
Date: April 8th, 2017
Location: Newry, County Down, Northern Ireland
Rebecca will be hosted by Positive Living Network for this one day workshop at Dromantine Retreat Centre. A roomful of women will be gathering to listen to the whispers of their soul, unleash their inner wisdom, potent power and rise together. A beautiful gathering!
Watch our for Rebecca’s article in our upcoming Spring issue!
LOMI LOMI MASSAGE BY EVA LENNOX
Eva offers Hawaiian Lomi Lomi Nui, along with other healing therapies, in Dublin city centre. Her journey with Lomi has brought many gifts but ultimately brought her a profound shift in her awareness and continues to transform her life daily. She is passionate about sharing this amazing practice with as many people as possible.
CELEBRATING MINDFULNESS WITH ULTRA SPIRITUAL JP / CONSCIOUS CONCERT 2017
Date: March 25th
RDS Concert Hall, Dublin
“In case you haven’t noticed, the New Age has become the Old Age. But don’t recycle your crystals just yet! His Enlightenedness JP Sears is ushering in the Newer Age, blinding us with the dawn-like brilliance that is Ultra Spirituality”.
Returning this year we have the wonderful Conscious Concert in Dublin including VIA SKYPE the hilarious new age comedian JP Sears. Click here to learn of the full lineup and to book your tickets.
We are giving away two tickets to the concert. Click here to learn how to participate!
CREACON LODGE EXPERIENCE
Our very own Paul attended an open day here recently and absolutely loved it.Their Food Is Medicine programme introduces Eastern Therapeutic Cuisine and Ayurvedic meals to the menu. The philosophy is food is designed to nourish and keep you sweet and healthy and give you energy.AND boy the food is delicious, the rooms are gorgeous, the peace is free, and the vibe is lovely, check it out and check in….its magic. They do all sorts of packages to include, food , mindfulness, healing, yoga , whatever you need its there.
WE have two overnight stays to giveaway so you and a friend can switch off and turn on…all you have to do is share this link on social media and let us know on any of our pages, twitter, facebook or instagram.
CALM CURE BY SANDY NEWBIGGING
Sandy Newbigging, Author and creator of Mind Calm Meditation, Body Calm Mediation and the Mind Detox Method, is releasing a new book on his latest technique: Calm Cure. The book was described by The London Evening Standard as one of the ‘top 10 books on mindfulness and meditation for 2017.’
WATCH out for Sandy as our guest at an upcoming Positive Nights in May 2017.
Book will be out in stores on May 2nd, 2017. So stay tuned! If you wish to learn more about Sandy and his other work, click here.
INTUITIVE DINNER CLUB WITH PAUL BUGGLE
Date: February 4th
The Wonderful Intutitive Dinners with Paul Buggle are back! This is your chance to experience an incredibly insightful and heartwarming evening with Paul. There are still some places left, click here to learn how to book.
Paul will soon be launching a workshop event, its a one day workshop , held in Monkstown Dublin, teaching people individual
tailored methods to help them access their own higher, broader awareness. First one will take place on a Saturday in February, Full details coming soon. Stay tuned!
With the days becoming darker and nights closing in, it is an ideal time to nurture your inn er light. On e way to do this is to play with praise. By praise, I don’t mean anything religious. Rather, a very natural way of being that is experienced by being present and rising above judgement and criticism.
By Sandy Newbigging
Praise creates gratitude and gratitude leads to love. It is a choice that you can make at any moment, irrespective of what’s happening, and possesses the power to immediately make you feel good.
Let me prove it to you now. Wherever you happen to be as you read these words, find something that you do not like. (I know it’s not a very positive thing for me to ask you to do, but bear with me, we are going somewhere!) Then, once you’ve found it, actively think negative thoughts about it for a few moments.
You might notice a stain on the carpet, a pile of dirty clothes that need to be washed, or hear music that you don’t like coming from your neighbour’s place. Find something now and think negative thoughts about it for a few moments. As you do, notice what happens within your body and emotions. Do you notice a heaviness or constriction in your body, or any downward-spiralling negative emotional experiences?
Now, with the exact same thing you were just being negative about, I want you to find something praiseworthy. I appreciate that you may have to really stretch your imagination and be creative, but nevertheless, for a few moments, I want you to actively think positive and praiseful comments about it in your mind. For example, you could now choose to be appreciative of having a carpet that keeps your house warm, clothes to wear and fully functioning ears that are able to hear sounds.
Again, as you do, notice what happens within your body and emotions. If you genuinely do rise above the previous negative opinions by focusing on what you can praise, you will find that a change occurs within your psyche. The feedback I receive when asking people to do this includes that they feel lighter, more upbeat or open and expansive. Now here’s the point. Miraculously, the thing you were originally criticising did not have to change for your inner experience to improve – your experience changed and improved simply through the power of praise. This simple praise game illustrates a liberating possibility when it comes to enjoying freedom from problems and lightening up your life. It proves that your emotional experience of life is ultimately your choosing. By “experience of life”, I don’t mean the external events occurring because they can often be outside your direct control. However, your inner experience of life can always be an uplifting one if you choose to make it a priority to praise. Happiness comes from you being okay irrespective of what’s happening. If you have to manage and control your life so that it looks exactly how you think it should, then you are going to limit your opportunities to be happy.
External forces will govern your emotions and your mood will go up and down like a yoyo. However, with the power of praise you enter into a state of joyful existence, flowing from one moment to the next, effortlessly enjoying the journey. By cultivating an attitude of praise, gratitude and love, you don’t have to wait for your life circumstances to improve before you can experience your heart’s greatest desire. You can love life and be happier now!
Join Sandy’s Calm Clan www.calmclan.com if you are interested in meditation, selfempowerment and living fully.
From our Winter 2015/2016 issue. Be the first to read the next issue of Positive Life in print – Subscribe.
By Sandy Newbigging
We become what we focus on the most, so the Body Calm technique offers simple ways to connect with the power of meditation and embody a series of positive virtues and focus points. When thought and felt regularly, these can transform your belief system and mental and emotional habits, in turn affecting your physical wellbeing.
Over the years I’ve had the opportunity to observe a number of common beliefs held by people struggling with a range of health complaints, with some of the most harmful being, ‘I’m unsupported’, ‘I’m not good enough’, ‘I’m unworthy’ and ‘I’m weak’. The purpose of meditation is to rest within your real Self: the calm consciousness that is always within you, and discovering the aspect of your being that never gets stressed, sick or suffers. Even if your body is uncomfortable or presenting undesirable symptoms, you can find wellness within.
Body Calm meditation helps you to befriend your body, give it the rest it needs to recover and improves the communications between mind and body. With regular practice, it helps form new, improved beliefs; ones that encourage physical health.
The ‘CALM’ part of Body Calm stands for ‘Conscious Awareness Life Meditation’ and involves two main elements:
1. Being Gently Alert with your Awareness Wide Open – a technique I affectionately call GAAWO.
2. Occasionally thinking Body Calm Thoughts that help to heal the sources of stress.
Calm Thoughts are short statements used during open and closed-eye meditation that act as the antidote to any attitude that might be having a detrimental effect on your body or behaviours, and consists of three components: I am + Positive Virtues + Focus Points.
Despite being two of the shortest words in the English dictionary, ‘I’ and ‘am’ together are two of the most powerful. When you think or say ‘I am’, you are referring to the absolute aspect of your Self that is unconditioned consciousness, unbounded being and infinite awareness. ‘I am’ is pure, powerful and infinite. To harness the power of this statement, we marry ‘I am’ with a series of ten positive virtues. These encourage the mind to form healthier beliefs and help you to embody healthier states of being that support good health.
Each Calm Thought also has a recommended location within or around your body on which to put your focus when thinking it. With the inclusion of these focus points, the power of the Calm Thoughts is magnified significantly by working in a number of ways. All of the focus points are symbolic and appeal to the mind–body connection. For example, when it comes to the interconnectedness between the mind and body, most people I meet who feel they are ‘unsupported’ also tend to present lower back problems. So thinking ‘I am supported’ while focusing on the base of the spine can heal the belief and perception that you are unsupported.
By working in harmony with the symbolic nature of the mind–body connection, you reduce mental and physical resistance and more easily shape a new, healthier belief system and a more supportive attitude towards yourself and your body.
Sandy’s new book Body Calm is out now and is full of more great tips and advice on using the Body Calm meditation technique. sandynewbigging.com