We adore this beautiful extract from Dawn Cartwright’s article in our Winter 2-19/20 issue, in which she shared some advice on how we can bring more love into our lovemaking. to read the full article, check here for your local stockist, or subscribe to receive a copy direct to your door.
Stay in the Loop
4 Ways To Put More Love in Your Lovemaking
by Dawn Cartwright
Love and lovemaking are a continuous positive loop. The more love we feel, the more amazing our lovemaking becomes. The more amazing our lovemaking becomes, the more in love we feel. It’s a loop that lights up our world (and the way consciousness expands).
It’s not easy to stay in the loop. We want to stay in the loop, of course. Everyone wants to stay in the loop, but the loop, at some point, stops looping. Love becomes more of an idea. Lovemaking more of a memory. So, how do we do it? How do we stay in the loop?
1. Take Initiative
This one practice alone will change your life. Initiative is the ability to assess and initiate things independently. It’s when we sense what our lover needs and give without expectations. It’s one of the most attractive qualities a lover can possess.
First, assess the situation. Is your partner feeling energetic or tired? Emotional or physical? Initiate an activity that’s a match. Energetic and emotional? A swim in the sea, a cup of tea and some listening might be one way to put more love in your lovemaking. Tired and physical? A hot bath, partner yoga stretches and a massage could be just the thing.
Let go of any goal for sex. Be present to the love that appears. If sex happens naturally, that’s perfect too. Part of taking initiative is being comfortable with intimacy that may or may not lead to sex.
2. Time & Space
Open your diary and schedule five minutes each evening for making love. Consistency is key. If you typically go to bed at 11:00 p.m., schedule your lovemaking for 10:55 p.m. every night. Set an alarm. Treat it like the most important part of your day. Once you’ve scheduled it, this time is non-negotiable. It’s sacred. It’s yours.
Next, decide, what you’d like to do with that five minutes. Write down 365 passionate, loving, affectionate, daring, caring, connecting, enticing, sexy things you’d most like to do that only require five minutes. Then, each night, you and your partner, or you on your own, will treat yourself to one of those things (it’s okay to repeat your favourites).
It might be a five minute make out session, a five minute chat about all the things you feel grateful for in your partner, five minutes of yoga stretches, or a five minute “quickie.” Love is a muscle: the more you exercise it, the stronger it becomes.
Dawn Cartwright is a NeoTantra visionary, sacred writer, world traveler, and innovator in NeoTantra fusion. In 2020 she’s bringing her Fragrance of the Lotus Year-Long Advanced Study and Teacher Certification Course to Ireland. It’s going to be a year unlike any other. Complete your application at:
